Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize