hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Randomize
