i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
