Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
