Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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