It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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