a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize
