I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
