He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
it's like iHOP with fire
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Randomize
