I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
