My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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