Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Randomize
