he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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