so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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