butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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