Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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