Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
