Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
What happened to fro yo and sex?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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