How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
