I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
