the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
did you just send me my own nude
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
