I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I wear drunk well.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
