Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
