you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
