Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
