i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
As shirtless as possible
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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