He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
