haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
should my penis look like a turkey
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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