3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
