I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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