Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
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