yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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