Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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