you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
