I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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