Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I wanna passion pit in your ass
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
