I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
there's paper in my vomit.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
