Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
