Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize