We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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