You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
third nipple confirmed
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
