I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
this just has baby written all over it
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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