Hey man sorry I got all grabby
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Randomize
