I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
