Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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