So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Randomize
