you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize