They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
