I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize