yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
