Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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