The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
