Pappa wants mamma naked
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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